Let’s face it. The holidays can be stress ful for anyone with expectations for joy, gift-giving, and getting together with family, friends, and co-workers. When you are prone to worry, social anxiety, or depression, the pressure can feel doubled because you feel out of sync with all the expectations that apply pressure to your vulnerable spots. Here is some advice that could help you feel better prepared to avoid the pitfalls of the holiday pressure to be something you are not.
For worry-mongers: The problem is managing your desire for a perfect holiday and the uncertainty of being unable to pull it off. You may have done too much research on Pinterest or created unrealistic standards for gift giving and receiving the perfect gift. You may feel panicked about gift shopping, over-budget, baking, wrapping, and other tasks you still need to do.
The solution is to remember that planning and preparations are not enough to make a holiday. Being fully present and emotionally connected is essential to create a human connection. You are your ideal, so you should be realistic. Your family and friends will prefer to spend time with you rather than being impress by everything you do. Instead of focusing on impressing, delighting, and surprising, choose a few good and affordable things. Research has shown that people remember and value experiences more than things. Spending time with friends or playing games is much better than buying the perfect gift.
Socially anxious people:
The problem is managing your tendency to avoid people and criticizing yourself for not being socially more intelligent than you are. Perhaps you have been worried about the family gathering, the intrusive questioning about your personal life, the holiday party staff party, or the workplace gift draw. You may have devised great excuses to avoid these events because you are confident you will feel embarrassed, uncomfortable, or out of place.
The solution is to realize that avoidance is a sure way to spend a lonely, self-critical holiday. Instead, get up your courage and set a goal to show up. But, this time, your goal is not to embarrass yourself. The secret to getting along with others is simple, according to research. It’s to show interest in others by smiling at them and asking open-ended questions. We are drawn to people who smile at us and show curiosity about us. Great smiles show your teeth and leave wrinkles around your eyes and mouth. This is something you can only do sometimes. Over-smiling is not possible. Ask everyone open-end questions, and you can forget about talking about yourself. Open-end questions such as these can load onto your phone. If you don’t know what questions you should ask, you can pretend you are responding to a text to another question. These questions are fun for everyone, whether you’re with your family, friends, or strangers at the checkout. Listening to the answers will be a great experience. It’s a win-win situation for everyone.
Finally, if social anxiety is a problem, it’s essential to work on your tendency to make unfavorable comparisons with others that make you feel like a failure. People aren’t paying much attention to you because they’re paying too much attention to themselves. You can make a great impression by simply smiling and asking open-ended questions. This will let you put people at ease and show interest in them. It will also help you be friendly. It doesn’t matter how tall, thin, or overweight you are. It’s hard to imagine anyone not wanting to be like this.
The problem for the depressed is that you might annoyed by the holiday cheer and assume it is better for everyone if your family does not participate in the festivities. These activities might seem pointless or stupid if your depression can’t see the positives and assess the value of being active and social. Perhaps you wish you could hibernate all winter.
The best way to beat depression is to be physically and socially active. There are two options. If you stay at home, you can’t do anything to improve your mood or awareness of the excellent and enjoyable things in life. You can create positive experiences that will make you feel happier and more energetic and help you think better.
Holiday Stress Management
Research has shown that people who are depress have a better chance of functioning if they engage in activities that make them think about the good, beautiful, and pleasant things around them. Consider reading or watching The Christmas Carol. Scrooge, a chronically depressed man, is the perfect example of someone who finds life worth living if he is focused on helping others, sharing his joy with others, and counting his blessings. Scrooge may have been right about depression research. It is easy to overcome depression by writing down three things you are grateful for daily. Take a cue from Scrooge, and get started immediately on this one to improve your holiday season.
These practical ideas can use by anyone, regardless of their age, to make holidays more enjoyable, more pleasant, and more of what you want.